Expectation Creep

Where have all the pumpkins gone? Gone to lanterns every one...
Obviously, if I really wanted to carve one that badly this year, I should have, would have made the effort much, much, much earlier. *sigh*

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There are things in life that are very nice to do for other people. It's nice to be generous and supportive. Sometimes we love doing those special things. Sometimes it even comes naturally, and why stifle that gift?

But then sometimes that extra gesture becomes an expected service, and there be expectations and grumblings. Oy.

A couple times, it's a sweet gesture. They love it and one gets gratitude and appreciation. Next thing you know, it's been written into your responsibilities. Don't let it happen to you.

The flip side: appreciate the generous gestures that come your way every day or every so often.

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NaBloPoMo. Not just a good idea: it's good for you too. hehe.
Believe that if it helps.

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Cozy as Winter Comes On

Talked to my sis in law. We are brainstorming a Thanksgiving feast that does not involve hours of cooking. Her usual chef in residence has to work that day, so she's decided she won't attempt a turkey without his help, although I offered to drag out my pre-vegetarian experience to stuff the ol' turkey. I could do it. But we decided to not bother so much. Less cooking, more games with the kids would be ideal.

My philosophy is to keep the foods and traditions that are most meaningful and to not worry about the rest. We decided to start a list. What do we *really* want to cook and eat?

So far, we have apple cake, pie, some kind of squash, mashed potatoes and gravy, pie, rice pilaf, and pie. Did I mention pie? Last year I did the whole mince pie thing (which I always do), but none of my in laws found it particularly compelling. Fine. There was plenty leftover for me to eat for breakfast lunch and dinner the way I/we usually do. Yum. But given that we are traveling, I am now thinking of what I can make ahead of time (rather than having to cook all day once I get there). Maybe I can precook the squash and mash it and *freeze* it for the trip up, then reconstitute in time for a hot casserole with pecans. That might work. Save the mince pie for Christmas this year. Or make some for upcoming potlucks... mmmm.... Distracted by thoughts of mince pie....

Where was I? Thinking about Thanksgiving. The truth is, I don't mind that slow tipping towards the end of the year and Winter Solstice. This is the time when the days shorten and our bodies slow down. It feels right to gather with friends and family, cook autumn feasts, and gather 'round the fire to toast our good fellowship, to slow down and contemplate even as the commercial frenzy ramps up. All of a sudden we have several gathering events this weekend marking turning points. A baby shower. A house warming. A bonfire and convivial gathering to celebrate the warmth of friendship against the gathering dark. All very cozy and wonderful.

So the Thanksgiving feast will probably include some archaic symbolism of reassuring ourselves of plenty as Winter comes on. Not that we can't get --good grief-- tomatoes and arugela at all months of the year, but sweet potatoes, nuts, roast grains, fall greens... These feed our physical psyche. The deep part of ourselves that craves that reassurance that We Are Ready For Winter. I've got my sweaters and furry slippers and pecans and some jazz on the radio. How about you?